Eddie has recently started reading the book ‘The Big Wish’ by Brandon Robshaw. It has clearly caught his imagination as on the way to school, he turned to me and said,

‘Mummy if you had one wish what would it be?’

I wasn’t expecting such a deep question on a Friday morning, Eddie didn’t realise how thought provoking such a question would be to me. It hit me like a ball in the stomach, an image of Livvy playing in the sun, carefree with no protection entered my head. I shook it off and dismissed the image, I couldn’t share my thought with Eddie, Livvy was sat in the back listening. I don’t want either of them to think that my wish would be to change them in any way, I want Livvy to be well and healthy but I don’t want to change a thing about her, XP has transformed her into a courageous fighter that won’t let anything dampen her smile, if I wish to take XP away would that change my little fighter into something less?

A few seconds had passed since Eddie had hit me with the morning’s question, I needed to respond but had no idea what to say, so I skilfully spin balled it back at him! I put on my – ‘ooooh I’m not sure about this one face’, and said ‘Eddie that’s a hard one, I’m really not sure what I would wish for, what about you, what would you wish for?’

A perfect spin ball, as he started thinking about it, with a smile he said ‘definitely a million wishes!’ He was following the boy in the book that he had started reading the night before, wether he would still wish for the same by the end of the book we will have to wait and see.

I saw Livvy in my mirror and thought I’d ask her what she would wish for. No hesitation, she smiled and confidently said ‘sweets’. Eddie and I turned to each other and laughed! I said to her, ‘Livvy you can wish for anything in the world, anything you can think of’,

‘I know’ she replied, ‘you’d wish for sweets?’ I asked her again.

With a nod of the head and a smile on her face she confidently replied ‘yes’.

She doesn’t think about changing herself or wanting more from life than the constant battle of protection, she’s so happy and content being Livvy that she’d use her one wish on sweets, nothing unimaginable from a make believe land, just quite simply sweets, something that will put a smile on her face in the here and now.

If she is happy being herself and doesn’t wish to change then I’m happy too, I don’t want her to change, I love her just the way she is, XP and all.

I think I may follow in her footsteps, I’d wish for chocolate, guilt free chocolate that contains no calories at all! That would be my one wish.